I guess there's always been a line between acquaintance and friends, friends and best friends, best friends and more than just best friends. I never realised that the line between best friends and acquaintance could come so close too. I guess that best friends was a term that both of us established when we actually were, at that point of time, but I would like to liken friendship to an anti-virus software on the computer.

You always need to run checks on your computer to make sure everything's running alright, smoothly, un-virused. It doesnt mean that at a point in time where the virus scan says your computer is free of virus, there never will be virus attacking your software. Every now and then, maybe 2/3 months, checks must be run just to make sure that everything is okay, and when there's a virus, you look into the source and try to clear it up so your computer will continue to function well. The scenario is this, you havent ran updates/routine checks on your computer in about a year or more, and you know very well that there is a virus, you're just too lazy to update your virus software. You live with the notion that your computer will be fine, veiled with the facade that your computer is protected by the anti-virus, which by the way has failed you so you should think of another way to solve it. So eventually when your computer breaks down, you realise that you should've done something about it when you could, now its too late.

Another analagy to give about a slightly different but related incident is this: Friendship is like, Silver & Gold. Maybe you've heard they saying, maybe not, but there's one that goes "Make new friends but keep the old, one is silver the other, Gold" You know, in the past, Gold was highly sought after and people valued it a lot, now silver is the new trend and no one really wants to be caught wearing Gold around their necks, especially when one is young - that is, young, foolish and oh so predictable. Lets just pretend that Gold is worth a lot of money and Silver not so much, you can only keep one of the 2, you recently had a fetish for Silver, and even though Gold is supposedly worth more, you decide on the spur of the moment to sell the Gold away and keep the Silver. Maybe I'm petty, but how could you not tell me? Finding it our from someone else had got to be the most painful experience you could give me.

In a simplistic relation to common lingo, people summarise the above into one question, "If _____ and ______ were both trapped in a burning building and you could only save one, who would you save?" So think about it, who would you save? Cause sad to say, with the pent up hurt, I defintely would not save you.

SORRY FOR THE LACK OF UPDATES!!!

But, now i'm baaaaaaack. Haha, dont you miss me? Not quite, whatever. ANYWAY, back to my life - not like i started, but - its been, well boring would be a not so nice way to put it, routined more like it. I've started settling down in CJ, and my life has assumed a more normal pace now, with trying to handle the workload, CCA and church, juggling everything so i still have time for friends. Wow, JC life really is hectic, whats more I'm only J1 and things already are crazy - madness - so i cant imagine life next year.

SO, yesterday i went to watch "As You Like It" by William Shakespear which was put up by the ACJC drama society or something I think, with Kevin. It was not too bad, I mean I guess thats cause I watch too many musicals etc. with my mom by the pros so to me it wasnt really good, but good for a school production I guess? The storyline was boring, but then again, shakespear, Iniki was acting though as an important character in the play, and Nicole was dancing, so that was pretty cool. The cast was trying really hard to have an English accent and most of them werent bad at all, accept this shepherd, oh gosh, he could not sound more chinese than the way he sounded yesterday. It kinda screwed the play up, cause like, his chinese accent was really bad, can you just imagine how he interacted with the other characters!? HAHA, but Kevin & I laughed over it anyway.

AND anyway, I was on the bus with Kevin and telling him that Colin's the only person I know who went to VJ and hasnt changed, the new J1s also havent yet, cause they just went there, but he pointed out that most people change in JC its just that you dont notice it yourself. Thats true, but I do hope I change for the better. I dont know if its me, but I feel like people around me are changing, and I dont know if thats good or bad. To me, you've become really short tempered lately, and less sensitive than you used to be, I dont know if this is just a phase thing or if its gonna last forever. I can never open my mouth to tell you, I just dont have the courage to do it, what if telling the truth means losing you? Then, I'd rather live with it. Sometimes I'd really like to know what you think too, cant you just tell me at that moment or something? I dont like finding out a few hours later, not knowing if the person you're talking about is me or not. I dont like playing games like these, cause honestly I dont have the time to do it anymore. Maybe its just me, but I feel like you're always telling me that I'm selfish and that I think the world revolves around me, but I really dont think the world revolves around me. Plus, no one else has been telling me that, just you, then I guess its good that one thing is a constant.

I dont know what to feel now. Upset? Angry? Or should I just let it go, let it pass. Pretend I dont care and just continue with life? I dont know, really. I'm tiring of guessing. I think you've changed, or maybe I have, so to the changed me you've changed, I dont know. Whatever it is, whichever way this goes, whoever has changed, there is a difference, I can feel it, but I'm not gonna let it defeat me, I just hope that you feel the same way too.

Just finished watching the Jack Neo press conference thingy and I guess seeing people get torn apart is the worst part of all these scandals. As important it is, getting the news of this whole thing, I think reporting this to the whole wide world wouldnt be such a bad thing if not for all the reporters who take like 12380981023649786 pictures of Jack Neo and his wife. I mean like, seriously, why do you need so many pictures of them, if you wanna see their every action take a video! Yes, so its wrong to cheat on your spouse, but since its been done, cant the media leave them alone to settle it between themselves, its already so hard to handle why make things so much worse! Everyone makes mistakes in their lives, its just how serious your mistakes are, and who it affects. I think marriage requires alot of sacrifice and learning how to work around each other, if you divorce because of a scandal like this, it really shows how strong your marriage is. To catholics, what God has unified, man cannot divide. The same pricipal applies here, but I guess i really wont know how it feels like to be cheated on till i get married and the same thing happens to me - of course, hopefully not but - only then will i be able to fully understand the emotional trauma of this whole situation.

That aside, GUYS! I'm going to Prague tomorrow!!! Arent yall excited for me, its gonna be a totally awesome trip because the choir is so gonna win this competition :D WE CAN, WE MUST, WE WILL! Yup, for all those who dont know, i'm going to Prague with the CJ Choir for a Choral Competition. OH YES. Haha, and yes i did just join the choir about a month ago, and learnt 7 songs by heart, memorised with dynamics to go for an audition and made it through :D Haha, okay la i think i really got in on a fluke cause I was really under performing on the day of the auditions. But anyhoo, i'm going to Prague now, its turing into spring so it wont be as cold, by the time we land in Prague the estimated temperature there is about 10 degrees in the day and 5-7 @ night so thats not too bad, i'll survive. So yeah, see you guys in about 12 days!!!!!