i want to, fry your brain cells. please let me. please. if thats the only way i could keep you near me. please. i'm begging you. i used to always think its no big deal if you left, but now i realise that it is a big deal. even though i never really thought we could get this close, we did, because of special circumstances. and i dont want anything to change. i really dont want it to. when you were closer, i had comfort knowing that you'd be always there for me. but now that every thing's changing, i dont want anything to be different between us, i just want us to be close to each other, i cant afford to lose you. i really cant. i cant believe you're gonna leave IJ for VJ, i know i cant do anything to change it, i know that whatever i say now wont make a difference, you'd still go to VJ anyway. but i just want to tell you, i'm really gonna miss you, the time we've spent, the secrets we've shared, the lunches together. i dont want you to leave without knowing that i care. i'm going to find it hard to go to school and find you not there.

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i cant hold the truth. i just want everything to be normal. no matter what people think of you, you'd still be you and even though i love the old you, i'm gonng embrace the new you still the same. you're still the same person and thats not going to change. you still keep the secrets we share and thats one of the many reasons why we're so close. just, dont be too sad. everyone changes and i'm just afraid of the day that i do. i dont want anything to change, if i am changing, tell me okay? i'd want to know why.

this is probably gonna be the last post in another 2 weeks. going to NZ for a holiday. so people, dont bother checking. while on the holiday, when i'm away from everyone, i think i'll think alot. about everything thats changing. i just need these kind of times to think. peace and quiet. serenity. so see you guys in 2 weeks!