thank you god for all you've done for me, thank you for blessing me with everything that i needed to get through life, and i've just realised that just because of my own selfish reasons for wanting to do well, i've just taken away the chance for god to let someone else live.

i'm sorry god, that i had been so demanding to want you do this and that for me. i didnt realise that with the time you needed to give me what i wanted, you could have used the time to save someone else.

i feel so bad knowing that i might have been the cause of people dying and diseases spreading. i should have been grateful for what i had. i'm sorry.